Monday February 10 - Sunday February 16, 2020

Come here to talk about things that are not related to agoraphobia.
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sbm12405
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Re: Monday February 10 - Sunday February 16, 2020

Post by sbm12405 » Thu Feb 13, 2020 3:37 pm

First all - Happy birthday Conn!

Cheryl - Mine turned into bronchitis as well. Take care of yourself.

So by Tuesday night I was completely at a breaking point. Another fight over medical bills. This one my wife thankfully handled and got straightened out but it still stressed me out. Then Tuesday afternoon I had an appointment with a cardiologist. My pulmonologist is questioning my asthma diagnosis so he wanted my heart checked out. Scares the crap out of me. My mom died when she was just 2 years older than I am now of terminal heart disease. I registered at the front desk and the lady there said my secondary insurance said that I didn't have a policy through them. I told her the way I've been told it should be billed and then told her if that didn't work either call the company or my wife because I just couldn't handle it right then. Thankfully she figured it out by the time my appointment was done. My heart rate was 125 by the time I got into a room. Stress and anxiety. By the time I got home I was exhausted physically, mentally and emotionally. my wife held me for awhile and then drew a bath for me. She went and fed the dogs and made a cup of hot cocoa for me then delivered it to me while still in the tub. I felt loved.

Yesterday she took the day off work. Told her work she had a personal thing she had to attend to. Then she held me, caressed me and massaged all the tight muscles I have from coughing for over a month. Mid-afternoon we got up and watched some tv. There is a mini-series/documentary on Netflix called "Night on Earth". It's six episodes long and then there is a "trailer" We watched all six episodes yesterday. Then the trailer started. We expected it to be just a few minutes. It was nearly an hour long. It showed what they had to do to get the shots that they got. Including the camera equipment and rigs. That was awesome to watch.

Yesterday was just what I needed. I didn't want her to take a day off work because of me but I'm so glad that she did because I feel much better now. And she told me that if we have any more bills come in for medical stuff to let her know and she will deal with them so I don't have to. I'm so glad she is in my life. Don't know what I'd do without her.
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Sarah
Just when the caterpillar thought it's world was over it turned into a butterfly.....

I am not a doctor or other medical professional. If you are in need of medical care please contact emergency services or go to the nearest emergency room.
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Conn
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Re: Monday February 10 - Sunday February 16, 2020

Post by Conn » Thu Feb 13, 2020 4:07 pm

Sarah, thank you for the birthday wish :D
I’m glad your wife is handling the medical bills for you. They can be so stressful! My husband handles everything except medical bills. He just isn’t great at medical stuff. Neither am I lol, but one of has to do it. Thankfully he handles all the other things with finances. Used to be all on my shoulders for years and he took over about 7 years ago. I have to admit he does a better job of it than I did. But to my defense when I handled the money we still had kids at home and I helped them way more than I should have..... mostly my son :cry:
That’s so sweet that she took the day off just to pamper you. Everyone needs a day of pampering now and then. It can do a world of good !

Not sure what my day has in store. So far I’ve laid in bed and now sitting on the couch with my cup of decaf mocha :)
I’ll have to go to my moms at some point and I think we’re supposed to go to my daughters this evening for my birthday. Saturday evening we might be going out to celebrate with friends ..... I want to go, but I also don’t want to go :?
I’ve been extra fatigued. My body is just tired !
Yesterday I did some online searching for a new therapist. Actually found a group in my little town that I might try. I just hate going to new therapy and having to rehash all my old traumas. It’s necessary to get started , but I’ve worked hard to put them in the past ... so digging it up is exhausting. I’m happy with the progress I’ve made since when I was stuck in my house, but I want more !!! I want to be able to be less afraid when I’m alone! I want to be able to drive more alone! I want to be able to travel again with my family. So I’ll figure out how to contact my insurance to see if they pay for therapy at all... and go from there . My previous therapist didn’t take insurance so it was all out of pocket. My daddy used to pay for most of it for me because he wanted me to continue and get better. My husband isn’t going to love paying for therapy. But I need it to get the tools and confidence to make further progress. I’ll have that talk with him soon.
Well I’m off to figure out what the day has for me :)

Faerie, you’ve been quiet again. Hope all is okay!
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Vickiem1124
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Re: Monday February 10 - Sunday February 16, 2020

Post by Vickiem1124 » Fri Feb 14, 2020 3:33 am

I get it Conn my case manager/ counselor just let 2 weeks ago and they haven't given me a new one yet she says the beginning of next week someone will contact me we will see Yeah have to start all over again
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Conn
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Re: Monday February 10 - Sunday February 16, 2020

Post by Conn » Fri Feb 14, 2020 2:52 pm

Sorry you have to start over with a new counselor, Vickie. Hopefully they have notes from your previous counselor that will help them get to know you.
I wish I had notes from my previous therapist. I’d hand them over and say “here’s some reading for you to do.... we’ll chat when you’re finished” lol.
I still haven’t contacted my insurance or talked to my husband about us paying for a therapist. He won’t love it. He tries to understand my issues, but he is the most laid back, calm person I’ve ever known.... so it’s hard for him. I understand not everyone gets it if they don’t experience it themselves. I know he understands as much as he can from watching what I go through. And of course his life has been altered because of it also since he’s been married to me for almost 33 years.
I’m just needing to try to make more progress. I read about those who can travel and just wish I could do that. I am terrified of facing the panic if I’m not within reasonable distance of my safe space. Ugh....
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sbm12405
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Re: Monday February 10 - Sunday February 16, 2020

Post by sbm12405 » Fri Feb 14, 2020 3:54 pm

Starting with a new therapist sucks. I basically told my last one I wasn’t coming back because I wasn’t making any progress. I haven’t seen her since September. I need to find another one too. I have a list from my insurance company. Unfortunately I can’t find any information on any of them and I hate going to see someone blind. You need to click with a therapist and I’d really don’t want to waste my time with someone who I may not like their views.
Sarah
Just when the caterpillar thought it's world was over it turned into a butterfly.....

I am not a doctor or other medical professional. If you are in need of medical care please contact emergency services or go to the nearest emergency room.
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sbm12405
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Re: Monday February 10 - Sunday February 16, 2020

Post by sbm12405 » Fri Feb 14, 2020 10:09 pm

Guys - I had a fantastic morning. Then I went to acupuncture for the first time since the beginning of January. I felt great. My wife went to her cardiologist appointment and he said all her tests came back normal so she does not have any heart problems. Things were going well.

Then I get a phone call from a doctors office. I messaged them asking if they could send in for a prior authorization for a medication I am on. My doctors assistant called to say since he wasn’t in network with them they weren’t even going to try to get an authorization because it will be denied anyway. He was in network when I signed up for it and sometime between signing up and it going into effect he left the insurance network. So we decided he was too good of a doctor and we’d just private pay for him. Oh and the medication? It’s my freaking rescue inhaler that I need so I don’t die if I have an asthma attack. I then started thinking about my psychiatrist who doesn’t even take insurance and am now wondering if any of those drugs will be covered.

I am beside myself right now. My wife said she’d handle it but I can’t even handle giving her the information she needs to deal with it. I can’t handle much right now. I’m turning off my phone and computer for a while. I’ll likely turn my phone on Monday late afternoon to check for messages. Then turn it back off. I’m waiting on a call to schedule a CT scan of my heart. Otherwise I don’t need to go anywhere or do anything until Friday morning. And I’m just going to hibernate. I need a break and the world just isn’t giving to me.
Sarah
Just when the caterpillar thought it's world was over it turned into a butterfly.....

I am not a doctor or other medical professional. If you are in need of medical care please contact emergency services or go to the nearest emergency room.
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Vickiem1124
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Re: Monday February 10 - Sunday February 16, 2020

Post by Vickiem1124 » Fri Feb 14, 2020 11:31 pm

medical stuff yuck I have to go geta sleep study go see a podiatrist go see a eye doctor go see a diabetic educator and they want me to give myself shots I don't like needles
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